Zen Helped Me Overcome Inner Fear

I just had a wonderful experience.

After a while of meditation practice, I felt tired and sleepy, so I lay down on my bed and took a nap. I don’t know how long it took, I suddenly felt like my “soul” had left my body, and just floated over.

I opened my eyes and saw the ceiling and the curtains, but nothing else, everything was normal, and I couldn’t turn my head or my eyesight to see more of the surroundings.

Some invisible force was pushing my back, pulling me up, and then pushing me from my chest and dragging me down through the bed. I felt like I was sinking. And then I was pulling up again, and then dragged down again, over and over several times.

Then I felt another two invisible forces pulling my legs, they were lifted up, then bent, then stretched, over and over again. Sometimes I felt pain, seems like they were trying to pull my legs off my body.

I tried hard to move my eyesight to look down, trying to see those forces, but with no success. Then I remembered something, I was lying on the bed, with no shoes on, but my feelings at that moment clearly suggested that I was wearing shoes.

So I no longer tried to resist, and just let those forces continue playing with my legs. It felt like a massage, I was getting more and more comfortable and relaxed. After a while, maybe serval minutes or so, they finally stopped. And then I was really awake and able to control and move my body.

This isn’t the first time I encounter sleep paralysis, it had happened many times before. But unlike in the past, I didn’t feel afraid this time. Because I cannot control my body, I was usually afraid of losing it and never coming back to reality. But this time, I did not fear, I even managed to enjoy it and was able to understand the environment and my reality status.

I suppose my Zen practice and meditation over the past few weeks have finally paid off, now such an experience no longer fears me and makes me panic, instead, it gives me a feeling of freedom and relief.

I’m now more peaceful and calm than I used to be, and the fear I used to have no longer bothers me so, I give all the credit to Zen practice and I will continue meditating even more.

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